Severed Review Part Deux: "Amor Fati"
By Aderyn

"Amor Fati" was a mytharc-soaked, dream-sequence-stuffed, minor-
character-killing, tear-inducing extravaganza of an episode. Far be it from
me to forget the throwaway literary references, mythological parallels,
and the water. Lots and lots of water everywhere.

Skull: Huh?
Aderyn: Tears were a' flowing, seas were a' symbolising.
Skull: Huh?
Aderyn: Anyway...

Scully and her machete had somehow made it back to the US of A,
only to be confronted with the dilemma of what to do about her partner.
Mulder was having visions, had made some really bad hair choices,
and had somehow got himself admitted to a hospital where they spread-
eagle you on a crucifix shaped table and inject medication into your skull.

Skull: Sounds alright to me.
Aderyn: Maybe they injected him in the head because of that "fat head"
thing from last week?
Skull: You mean THIN. Remember, someone posted that he'd lost weight.
Aderyn: Listen up, I don't know nowt about Latin -- but I don't
think it's a coincidence that "FATI" sounds an awful lot like "fatty".

In a surprisingly non-manipulative move, 1013 decided that Mulder's
subconscious was stuffed to the brim with visions of The Foul One.
While it was surmised that this could indeed represent the road
not taken, it was also taken as an indication of just how sick his man-pain
mind really was.

Skull: No wonder he needed brain-surgery.
Aderyn: Lobotomise him already.

The fabulously well written Fowley served to bring pent-up emotions
to the fore. When she wasn't bedding Mulder, she was making Scully
cry. And just as she was getting interesting, the skanky ho went and died.

Skull: Ding-dong the bitch is dead.
Aderyn: Awwww, that's so sweet.
Skull: Ding-dong, no more hooters made of lead!

The CC mytharc machine rolled forward, spilling new revelations
by the second. In a shocking twist, it was suggested that CSM is
even more virile than was previously feared -- spawning yet more
evil, and second-rate characters by the episode. Oh yeah, and he also
fathered us all.

GA gave another peerless performance, emoting while standing on
a box like no other. A minor point of contention was her co-ordination.
Her lips missed their intended target in one particularly vital
scene, leaving her to look a little foolish for giving the punk's forehead
some lovin'.

Skull: No, that's not right -- they just decided that it was *really*
cold in Mulder's apartment. So it was a frostbite kind of thing.
The cold suctioned them together.
Aderyn: OUCH.
Skull: Another theory, I believe, was that Mulder had turned into
the kid from "The Sixth Sense".
Aderyn: Oh. That would explain why Scully was looking down at him
instead of up.
Skull: Heh heh. You said "up".
Aderyn: Ohfergawd'ssake.

Ever the professional, she more than made up for this error by winning
all the prizes for her tear-duct control. During an emotional reunion
with the sickly Mulder, she managed to land a perfectly aimed tear
executed with panache that only TBO can muster. The water droplet
fell to its target while undergoing a triple somersault with a double
backflip.

Skull: I hear the dismount was clean.
Aderyn: I gave her a 9.5.
Skull: <sniffle> That tear launched a thousand ships.
Aderyn: Tell me about it. I've got the mother of all splinters stuck
in my ass, from sitting on that damn Fence this week.

XF has a variable record with episodic resolution, as in you're
lucky if you get any. Scully didn't get any during this episode,
but it's just as well -- because women with a healthy sexual appetite
shall not ascend to movie franchise heaven. The conclusion to Amor
Fati found the Dynamic Duo bumming around on a beach. Unanswered
questions remained, but any such thoughts were pushed aside as Scully
revealed her new hair extensions a la Rapunzel. Gotta love the CHarc.

Skull: Wait, that's not right. They decided it was based on Sleeping
Beauty's.
Aderyn: Rapunzel.
Skull: Didn't someone mention The Little Mermaid?
Aderyn: RAPUNZEL -- as in "Rapunzel, Rapunzel, let down your hair."
Skull: No that's not it, because another know-it-all found parallels with
Beauty and the Beast.
Aderyn: Stop confusing me, wench.
Skull: Oh, whatEVer -- all I know is that I've just cut off all
my hair so that I can maintain my Scullyclone status, and now I'm
going to have to nonmoviewording grow it again.
Aderyn: Hey, I've just thought of something -- I'll bet she's going
to braid her hair, and try to get Mulder into the sack by appealing
to all that residual Samantha guilt!...
Skull: That's one deviant thought too far.
Aderyn: ... OMG, did I just type that out loud?
Skull: Finish this damn review already, before you totally ruin our
reputation.

Overall, "Amor Fati" - which can be translated into anything from
"Love of Fate" to "Destiny's Choice"...

Skull: to "Noromos Rule" to "Mulder and Scully Require Hot Monkey
Lurve", depending on the level of one's delusion,

... was an beautifully crafted display of character development.
Mulder survived. Scully cried. Fowley died. What more can we possibly
ask for?

Skull: Oh, I don't know...maybe PLOT?
Aderyn: AHEM.

The episode, contrary to popular opinion, was not lacking in plot.
Most of it was imaginary, but this is a trivial point. In fact,
it was revealed at the end of the episode that aliens have the technology
to build UFOs out of sand.

Skull: Oh, so THAT's how the big honking UFO disappeared without
a trace. It was swept away with the tide.
Aderyn: I told you. Symbolism. Or something.

Stay tuned for next week, when the ultimate McDonald's conspiracy
is exposed in "Hungry". Will Ronald McDonald finally reveal his true
identity?

Skull: It's crack time no-ow...
Aderyn: Please. You have to write it, remember.
Skull: Oh. Crap.

-end